One Month In...
One month ago, I received my breast cancer diagnosis. It was the last thing I expected to hear after becoming mysteriously ill for several months prior to the diagnosis. I knew something was really wrong, but breast cancer was the furthest thing from my mind. I'm 34 years old. 34 year olds don't get breast cancer. At least that's what I naively thought prior to this day.
Upon receiving the diagnosis, my husband and I went to my parent's house to deliver the news in person. Telling my parents that I have breast cancer was the hardest thing I've ever had to do. Saying it out loud was not something that I was ready for, but I needed their support from the moment of diagnosis and so it had to be told. My mom couldn't understand what I was saying as she held me while I sobbed uncontrollably. As she rubbed my back, I finally calmed down long enough to say, "I have at least Stage 3 breast cancer and the doctor thinks it's probably stage 4 but more tests are needed."
The following two weeks were a whirlwind of tests, labs, trips to Boston to Dana-Farber Cancer Institute, and Brigham & Women's Hospital. Thank God for my mom and Jason. They were with me every step of the way. The tests ultimately revealed that the cancer had spread outside of the right breast, through my sternum, to my left breast, down to my left hip, and throughout lymph nodes in my body.
I am still grappling with this diagnosis. No one wants to hear that they have breast cancer. Stage 4 cancer is a whole other story. Stage 4 cancer can't be cured. The rest of my life will be spent fighting this cancer with everything that I have. The hope is that I will get to a point in treatment where there will be "no evidence of disease". However, the scans and tests will continue even during these periods. Statistics are scary. I have a 22% chance of being alive in five years according to the Stage 4 diagnosis. Those odds are not comforting. In five years I'll be 39. I never thought I might die before 40. Honestly, I never thought about dying at all. In my mind, the time was so far away that it wasn't worth thinking about. On the other hand, no one is promised tomorrow.
Modern medicine is pretty amazing and I will continue to pray for advances that may change my fate. Dana-Farber is a place of hope. They are an amazing research facility hospital and they are working on analyzing my biopsies and seeing if there might be another treatment after chemo that I could benefit from. I have faith that they will find something that will work for my cancer. I know that I have a lot of life left in me and that I am not ready to leave this Earth yet.
Upon receiving the diagnosis, my husband and I went to my parent's house to deliver the news in person. Telling my parents that I have breast cancer was the hardest thing I've ever had to do. Saying it out loud was not something that I was ready for, but I needed their support from the moment of diagnosis and so it had to be told. My mom couldn't understand what I was saying as she held me while I sobbed uncontrollably. As she rubbed my back, I finally calmed down long enough to say, "I have at least Stage 3 breast cancer and the doctor thinks it's probably stage 4 but more tests are needed."
The following two weeks were a whirlwind of tests, labs, trips to Boston to Dana-Farber Cancer Institute, and Brigham & Women's Hospital. Thank God for my mom and Jason. They were with me every step of the way. The tests ultimately revealed that the cancer had spread outside of the right breast, through my sternum, to my left breast, down to my left hip, and throughout lymph nodes in my body.
I am still grappling with this diagnosis. No one wants to hear that they have breast cancer. Stage 4 cancer is a whole other story. Stage 4 cancer can't be cured. The rest of my life will be spent fighting this cancer with everything that I have. The hope is that I will get to a point in treatment where there will be "no evidence of disease". However, the scans and tests will continue even during these periods. Statistics are scary. I have a 22% chance of being alive in five years according to the Stage 4 diagnosis. Those odds are not comforting. In five years I'll be 39. I never thought I might die before 40. Honestly, I never thought about dying at all. In my mind, the time was so far away that it wasn't worth thinking about. On the other hand, no one is promised tomorrow.
Modern medicine is pretty amazing and I will continue to pray for advances that may change my fate. Dana-Farber is a place of hope. They are an amazing research facility hospital and they are working on analyzing my biopsies and seeing if there might be another treatment after chemo that I could benefit from. I have faith that they will find something that will work for my cancer. I know that I have a lot of life left in me and that I am not ready to leave this Earth yet.
God bless you,you got this🤞
ReplyDeleteThank you for sharing.....Our church family is praying for you AND your family every Sunday and Wednesday!!!! May God give you peace, rest, and comfort as only HE can give.
ReplyDeleteThanks for sharing...We are praying for you and your family.
ReplyDeleteRosanna, thank you for starting this blog to document your journey. Those of us who love you especially appreciate your willingness to be so open about your journey through this challenging experience. I hope writing about your experiences gives you insight and comfort. Thinking of you and sending hugs and prayers all the time!
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